simplifying – Page 5

Toddler Clothes Burst

I recently shared my first “burst” of energy — ie using 15 minutes to accomplish one cleaning task. Today, I’m back to tell you about the burst of 15 minutes I spent in Hadley’s room.

Since I technically spent about 20-25 minutes on the first project and about 5 minutes on the second, I’d say I reached the goal of 15 minutes each.

Cheating? Naw. My house, my rules. 😉

With a growing little (or, NOT so little) guy, we regularly need to switch out Hadman’s clothes. Of course, this regularly DOESN’T happen. So, his dresser starts to look like this —

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That’s a nearly-full bin of size 18-month clothes next to the dresser. He’s comfortably in 24-month right now, so I went through his two drawers (the bottom is for sheets and blankies) to pull out too-small items and switch in some 24-month stuff we still had sitting around.

Ta-da!

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By the way, I’ve totally gotta use one of my 15-minute bursts to take that changing pad off. He hasn’t used it in, like, a year. Der. (And the cat toy is with its rightful owner…)

So, that burst took about 20+ minutes, which will sometimes happen. If I hadn’t given myself the 15 minute goal, I would’ve spent 30+ minutes, and there would’ve been some crying over how big our baby has gotten. But, not the case. No tears this time. Just a speed-cleaning. Bam.

This also had one of those overlapping effects; our office went from clothes mountain to “whoa, there was a desk chair under there!” (So maybe I did 3 bursts in 30 minutes. Sweet!)

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While I was at it, I organized the two under-crib bins that we use for the clothes that don’t fit the munchkin quite yet. I always keep his next size (sigh…2T) in the one on the left and anything higher in the one on the right. That way, at a quick glance, I can see that he’ll need undershirts or more pants for his next growth spurt. (BTW, isn’t “burst” better than “spurt”? Yeah, I almost considered using that word instead. You’re welcome, hee hee.) This system works SO well for us.

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Another side note: Dave has been stock-piling some Woot shirts in the smallest size for AWHILE. Needless to say, we don’t really need any shirts when he’s in a 4T. This one’s my favorite (others are eyebrow-raising…like the passed out Cookie Monster who’s been on a milk and cookie binge…I laugh, but others may not) —

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So, after about 30 minutes, Had’s clothes are under control again. Ahhhh. Nice.

And maybe…just maybe Winston helped.

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Maybe.

Bursts

Happy Presidents’ Day, guys!! Home with the munchkin today.

For whatever reason – winter doldrums, lack of exercise, the “the less you do, the less you can do” syndrome (I just made up) – I’ve got wicked low energy lately. And, of course you know what that means, right? One thing has to fall to the wayside. The same thing, all the time.

Cleaning.

At least, that’s what gets neglected around here. Don’t tell my mom (sorry, Mom!!); she’s got very high cleanliness standards. She called my sis and I “Cinderella” (and maybe our brothers from time to time).

At least I suppose the standards are there to some extent. I know and cringe when something’s filthy or dusty or precariously piled. But finding the energy to get it checked off the to-do list is another story.

I’ve seen something interesting about cleaning on no less than 20 other blogs (and probably 20 magazines before I was a blog reader), which tells us to use a 15 minute period throughout the day (as we find them) to accomplish something.

It could be spending 15 minutes doing the prep work for some freezer meals. It could be 15 minutes working on a small project you’ve had on your list for years. But, more likely than not, since cleaning is dreaded by so many people, it’ll be performing a chore around the house. And I’m calling them “bursts” (get it? A “burst” of energy?)…’cuz I’ve gotta categorize everything. Weirdo.

I decided to use my kitchen dry erase board to make a continual list of chores that can be accomplished in about 15 minutes. Y’know — while on the phone or just to achieve that “don’t put off until tomorrow what you can do today” philosophy before heading to bed or for that moment that I sigh after putting the baby down for a nap when my brain goes blank.

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While I was at it, I decided to start in the kitchen with one (yes, one) cabinet shelf. But, it’s the dreaded baby shelf, which I’ve been planning on organizing for awhile since Hadman only uses a particular type of sip-cup. So, in under 15 minutes, it went from this…

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to this…

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with this left to lug into the basement (which I did…but it all needs to be re-organized, of course)…

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It’s funny how kids only use ONE particular “style” of beverage receptacle, huh? And it’s sad to be packing away the last of the bottles, but it’s all good.

Oh, and by the way, the cabinet is completely clean (I scrubbed it), but it’s in dire need of painting — along with the rest of the kitchen cabinets. Needless to say, that’ll be a burst of more than 15 minutes worth of energy. 😉

I’ll be sharing a handful more “bursts” I’ve already used to get myself off my hibernating hiney. Otherwise, it’s so darn easy to wile away a snow day!

Coat Closet 2.0

Alternate title: ~~Skeletons~~ Scarves in the Closet.

So, I cleaned this closet a couple of years ago. I’m pretty sure that I’ve cleaned it since, but not for quite awhile. Liiiike…I didn’t have to switch our coats out when the cold weather came around this year. Let’s just blame it on the fact that parenting an infant was our priority over supah clean closets last year and move on, m’kay?

The issues with the “before” is mostly the pit of nothingness on the bottom, the fact that every time I put anything on the top shelf it fell back down immediately, and the sheer number of coats. SO. MUCH. CRAP. My breast pump (which we no longer need) was still in there…but it’s not like you can even see it. Purses? A puffy vest? Scarves? Unused yoga mat? Those, we see.

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The top had a few issues, but was relatively quick compared to the rest of the hot mess going on.

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The thing is, I sat in the living room for countless hours thinking about what a pain in the bum it was going to be to get this chore done. Hence, it sat unfinished. Isn’t that how it usually works? I could’ve pulled a “put a favorite movie on and just pull everything out.” But, regardless, I finally had a moment of clarity, realizing that it would actually be relatively simple enough to do, even with a little one running around. Not fun, mind you, but not hard.

So, I attacked the coats and scarves mercilessly. I couldn’t get rid of too many jackets since our weather likes to flip flop a lot this time of year, but we did purge a couple. The scarves were another thing, though. The ones I don’t use whatsoever, I put in a pile to donate. There are a couple that I’m on the fence about, so I’ll keep a thumb on the situation and purge them as needed. It’s a process.

Then, I turned my attention to the bottom business. Snow pants got hung on the Command hook I put up back in the day, purses got emptied (probably the lengthiest part of the job, but it was kind of entertaining finding two flash drives — after buying a new one for myself for Christmas — and notes and lists from several years ago) and flung in a tote in the basement or donated, and so on. That being said, one of my favorite yet busted-but-maybe-someone-will-like-it-anyway purses was donated, so I’m on the lookout for yet another. I’ve got a million medium-sized bags, but need a larger one that’s easier for everyday; read: in which my lunch and water bottle will fit. A big style-factor and ability to match the almost constant brown or black that I wear to work is a must, as well. Sometimes cleaning makes you realize what you don’t need, and what you REALLY, REALLY DO need.

Finally, I pulled out the step ladder and pulled out and reorganized the top shelf (namely, the two cheap little shelf thingies and the large fabric bin with long-since-used mittens, gloves, hats, etc.) It’s nice to know where those random things I always find myself searching aimlessly for will be easily at-hand now. Oh, and not pelting me in the head when I open the door. That’ll be nice.

Here’s what it looks like now:

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Those two metal hangers on the door were here when we moved in. They seem pretty old (maybe the ’50s?), and I almost got rid of the one on top. Luckily, I didn’t, since Dave got “into” old-style hats. And, yes. The door closes easily again. Isn’t that really the ultimate goal in life? To comfortably close a door? Or is that just me? *1,000 points for anyone who can name the picture on our calendar in the background, or at least the artist.*

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Closed!

Speaking of finally getting on top of a dreaded task, let’s just say that we’ve been spending a bit of time in the bathroom…and, no, we don’t have the stomach bug. 😉 I’m not done (of COURSE!), but most of it looks finished, and that. Is. Exciting. Exciting enough to keep me motivated enough to finish the last couple of bits before, y’know, 2015.

Christmas Decorating, Act One – Keeping It Real

Today’s part one (Act I, if you will) of a two-part holiday decor-fest. UPDATE: Here’s Act II, as it were, with living room and dining room decor!)

Last year, I told you all about the slightly irritating (yet charming) Christmas tree escapade we undertook to go from fake tree to real. For 2013, we found one pre-cut at a local-ish tree farm (maybe next year we’ll up the ante and find and cut one OURSELVES! Adventure time, Hadman). We decorated (rather, poor Dave had to chase Hadley around when he’d get distracted as well as the cats when they got mischievous — but Hadley did pick several spaces for some of the ornaments), and are now able to bask around it as a fun-lovin’ family.

*Already stirring the homemade hot chocolate mentally, humming “White Christmas”

Things are getting simpler in some ways, and complicated in others. It seems our decorating this year is more of a daily metamorphosis. Every day that goes by, a little more gets done.

Slowly, slowly, said the sloth.

So, first, up went some new, white bulb lights on our porch — never before had we attempted outside lights, and while I had the idea (all I did was purchase the things from Target, bring them home, and hand them over to Dave — who then had to figure it out), all props go to the hubs for hanging them on a very cold day.

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As days went by, I wound some fake greenery around the perimeter of the porch and down the railings. The final touch this year was a cute little (real) evergreen wreath with a red bow that we picked up along with the tree. Simple and sweet and classic.

(Side note: The cute little wreath is actually quite, um, bushy…so it does get a tad squished between our storm door and red door. Ah, the plight of an upstate New Yorker. Snowy areas can’t do without a storm door, no matter how cute a house looks without one.)

Speaking of tree, up it went, followed by a tangle of lights. (Let’s just say it’s not perfect this year. I’m usually impeccable about the lights. They’re actually overlapping in different directions. Disgrace!) The next day, Hadley “helped” hang ornaments. We didn’t put up half of what we had. Some are well-made but HUGE for the kind of weak branches we were workin’ with. But, we still put up a few of our quirky cheeseball “so us” ones. Hello, Superman and Yellow Submarine. I swear some year I’m going to get a small tree dedicated just to the weird ones, then have a separate “pristine” tree. But, for now, this is our life — it’s real, it’s messy, but it’s full of joy.

Oh, and I was also undecided on a topper. We don’t do the angel thing, or even the star thing (there were too many “drunk angel” jokes growing up, and I’m still far too immature to shove a tree up an angel’s dress); normally, I do a cascade of ribbons with a beautiful bunch at the top. I considered this…then considered doing nothing…when I suddenly had an, “Oh, this is different. This is rustic. This is kinda cozy-cute” idea. Scarf. And not just any scarf. It was my dad’s. So, hands off the scarf, buddy. (A longer scarf would allow for an adorable bow-tied effect — go for it if you have one!)

Just add a top hat and it’s Dickens in tree form.
…gotta find a top hat.

The tree (AKA pine-flavored kitty drinking fountain) is shorter and fatter this year, but that suits us just fine. We don’t use that room except for cat pans and cat stands (I suppose it’s the cat room), and a new-but-old-school radio/record player that we listen to Christmas tunes with. S’all good. It takes up the front room (it’s like the room was MADE for a Christmas tree; I finally listened to my mom and others and stuck it out there last year…they were right).

Oh, and it’s difficult to tell in the pictures, but in order to have a large enough “skirt”, I decided to use two past “skirts” and overlap them to make one — a crimson blanket that has a sweater weave goin’ on, and a piece of faux lambskin. It looks pretty darn cute by the light of day, and I appreciate the detail. One of these days, I’ll finally DIY a skirt that doesn’t look too feminine, nor too plain…and I’ll use the heck out of it year after year.

So, that’s all for today. Stay tuned for Act II, or as I call it SHINY + RUSTIC. In the meantime, feel free to weigh in below: Real or fake? Hodgepodge of ornaments or one streamlined “theme”? Lights outdoor or simple wreath? I’d love to hear your thoughts!

(And if you have kiddos at home, I LOVE reading David Shannon’s “The Amazing Christmas Extravaganza” to my kids at school. Mr. Merriweather loves his simple tree and wreath, but one year decides to add a string of white lights outside. When his grouchy neighbor, Mr. Clack, mocks his dinky display, things get out-of-hand (and, needless to say, the real meaning of Christmas is overshadowed).)

Toodles for now!

TJ to the Maxx

First of all, let me give you a quick update on how our debt diet is going. In a word, great. I actually have been experiencing overlap in the incidental area (which is okay with the holidays coming up; I’m sure it’ll get used!) since I’ve pretty much only purchased “needs” lately. It’ll be a learning process for me to actually allow myself to occasionally do or get something for myself. Like…y’know…a haircut. That, I need.

I was out and about in Utica for a day of developin’ my profession recently, and I stopped for a few necessities at Price Chopper and Pet Smart (yes, cat food is a necessity! Don’t want Kitty Protective Services coming for a visit!). While in the area, I found myself glancing at TJ Maxx. A lot.

This, like eying Target, can prove fatal. It’s SO easy to spend a kazillion dollars on all the loveliness these places dole out. Must. Stay. Sttrrrrrong.

So, I decided that I’d allow myself to go in, but not buy anything unless it was a Christmas present (which I’ve got money budgeted for). There are some AWESOME gift ideas at a TJ Maxx, folks, just give it a chance. But, guess what. I didn’t leave with one darn thing…and it felt pretty good.

I did, however, lurk around corners waiting for people to clear an aisle for me to take pictures of stuff that I liked. That way, I could chat about what I like without actually taking the stuff home. If I find myself dreaming about something and envisioning where it should live, MAYBE I’ll bring my cash allotment in for a visit. Maybe.

So, here’s some of the stuff I found myself drooling over…

I have far too much glass storage ware cluttering our kitchen shelves…but if you’re on the lookout for some, check out the Maxx. Oh, and The Christmastree Shoppe is good for this, too. 😉

SILVER!!! And for a closer look…

I was SO close to buying one or two of these (look at that PRICE!) but realized I didn’t have an immediate place for it. Wop wop.

The same goes for this round, adorably-patterned box. No purpose, not gonna get it.

I almost got this awesome blue container/vase (especially considering its size at $10) but eventually decided to walk away. #juststepaway

And my weakness? Pillows. So proud that I walked away with NADA.

I always enjoy checking out the furniture they have in hopes of one day replacing my eyesore of an armchair (still didn’t get the Target chair; the quality wasn’t enough for my everyday sittin’). They didn’t have a lot this day, though. This chair came the closest.

Need baskets?? We’ve got baskets!! And at incredible prices. Needless to say, I didn’t need any…this time.

I know it’s not a homegood, but I was shocked to find some pretty well-priced Melissa and Doug toys. Hadley’s not quite old enough for these yet, but I can’t WAIT to build him a play kitchen (real men cook) in a little while…and fill it with some of these things. (Although that “Fruit cocktail in light syrup” is questionable.)

Speaking of toys…CHRISTMAS!!!

Loving on that deer…and even the huge bronze turkey next door to Mr. Reindeer.

…and wreaths!!! I’m kind of surprised at how real (and well-priced) these looked while standing there. I’m considering heading back to see what they have left. Look at that jingle bell one on the right, and the snow-dappled pine cone one!

Vintage Santa art!! I totally should’ve gotten one of these to surprise Dave with. He’s all about the vintage these days. However, I couldn’t figure out where I’d put ’em. Isn’t that always the key?

But, yeah. Mr. Red-and-White may come home, if he’s still there.

Check out the array of trees! Rustic wood, sparkly winterland, and seashell…whuh?? And the pokey shells on those deer? Holy crap. So cool. Way too cool for me. 😉

Last but not least…look at the awesome guy gifts! Dave got himself a couple of these when he got his new job (with his own office) and I’ve been in awe of them ever since. Awesome for the holidays, folks. I’m hoping Santa will bring him one or two more.

I also find boxed work shirts for Dave here, as well as the occasional pair of jeggings (okay, just the one pair) or handbag…um, for me, not Dave. But, on this particular day I finally left after getting a contact high when a fellow patron walked by. WHOA. This is one classy joint, folks. **Side note: The first TJ Maxx I ever went to was down in Westchester County, so needless to say, they’re not all like this.** **Side note #2: I want a Home Goods. And an IKEA. And a Whole Foods. Is that too much to ask?**

So, what about you? Do you do the Maxx? (I will NOT refer to myself as a…you know what they call TJ Maxx shoppers on their commercials. Yeah. I’m not one of those.) By the way, I wasn’t perked by their company to write about this. It’s just an anecdote by a person they don’t know exists. 🙂 Or do you have a different place that you like visit to drool all over stuff then leave? Or is that just me?

Debt Diet

We’re going on a diet at our house. Nope, not THAT kind of diet. (I addressed something like that recently, though!)

Dave recently sent me a link to an article on an awesome blog, And Then We Saved. The writer, Anna, went on a Spending Fast® for a year and swept away her $24k in debt (actually, it was a total of 15 months, but I’m not sure if she was on the “diet” or “fast” that whole time…need to read more). There are some incredible tips on this site, and I appreciate her style of attacking financial issues.

While I’m not buried under massive debt (aside from our mortgage, which I don’t intend to pay off before moving to our next house; otherwise I’ve got a washer/dryer payment, car payment, and a tiny credit card payment that’ll be paid off this month :-)), my husband is still paying off some hefty student loans. Given that, I’d like to find a variation on the fast/diet to meet our needs and help me get better control of my monthly payments and a greater head-start on savings. I suppose we could call it “gaining control.”

The thing that I love here is the fact that I am far from a “Type A” personality, and the structure of this whole shebang is perfect for me. I’ve tried to budget a million times, and my brain simply doesn’t work that way. Go ahead and try to explain it to me; I just can’t do it. But, I’m not admitting defeat! There’s more than one way to make breakfast, y’know.

Which is why I’m doing a variation of what Anna touts. A fast is extreme; extremity tends to push me to the brink of giving up. However, if I can make some “serious” changes rather than extreme ones, it’s more likely to stick. It also means that it can lead to bigger and bigger changes — sticking in my toe, then my foot, then jumping in.

Another reason I can’t see myself doing a full fast *right now* is that it’s October and I’ve got some Christmas shopping to do. 😉 We’re putting limits on everything and everyone, so it should be a basic, all-about-the-memories sort of year (and I’m stickin’ to it!) but this aligns more with the diet than the fast concept. I know this sounds like an excuse, but it’s actually just realistic thinkin’.

Alrighty, so, all that explaining boils down to this:

Following the How to do a Spending Diet guidelines, here’s my list of “NEEDS” (asterisked are the items that I can try to reduce; whether that proves to be possible or not is yet to be seen, but I shall try!):

– Mortgage
– Cable/Internet (WISH I could get this reduced further :-\)
– Food* (Only. Buying. What. We. NEED. I’ve been working on wasting less, and I think it’s sticking, but then I go and buy extra yogurt when Dave has an unopened pack sitting in the fridge. Grrr. Silly mistake, lady!)
– Cell Phone* (Dave and I share this; depending on our usage, we may be able to choose cheaper coverage, woot woot)
– Car (already refinanced…can’t get it any lower…although these payments will be over in about a year)
– Insurance (car and home)
– One small credit card use (Kohl’s be damned)
– New washer/dryer payment* (I was gifted some $ which I need to get deposited in order to make an extra payment here; this will help lessen my payments for the duration of the year)
– Automatic deductions from my paycheck are sticking; I’m at the lowest as far as retirement contributions, blah
– Cat care (food ‘n litter; Dave and I split this here and there, depending on who gets to PetSmart first)
– Gasoline* (Can’t help driving to and from work, but we need to get our trips to the Utica area under control…like, not every weekend and not during the week unless for a doctor’s appointment or something important; Dave works out there, and we often have to take 2 cars, which sucks.)

Side note: Dave pays utilities and half the cell bill — I do hope to pay more attention to the thermostat (but keeping it regulated as far as the baby’s concerned; not gonna kick it down to 58 when he’s home) and simple electricity use, which we’ve gotten away from. Say, right now, the kitchen light’s on and QVC’s playing in the background. I clearly don’t need Today’s Special Value and no one’s hanging out in the kitchen. Off and off.
So, since these are all “needs”, when the “need” arises, I’ll shell over the ka-ching and try not to stress myself out doing so. When it comes to the non-needs, the time of year that I’m starting this little experiment dictates that I’m not “fasting” (only spending on “needs”), which means that I’ll allow myself a chunk of change.

I’m choosing $150 per month for incidentals (but trying hard NOT to use that amount; post-holidays, I’ll reevaluate and possibly cut it back to $100 or less), be they clothes/makeup (a rare expense)/haircut (even rarer – maybe once a year)/entertainment/eating out/gifts/home decor stuff/cat toys (ahem)/etc. Once I’ve used up this cash, I cannot spend on ANYTHING other than the NEEDS above. This essentially means that we won’t be eating out (maybe once a month, even if it means ordering a pizza), buying clothes for myself, buying a bunch of books just because they’re on clearance (dude, it’s still not free) or sinking tons of money into the house. Looks like I’ll be working on some organizing; that’s free! And maybe an on-sale can of paint here and there. *cough*diningroom*cough*

The tough thing here? I already mentioned it — Christmas. I do have quite a bit saved in Christmas Club, but not everything I need (especially since we need to purchase a real tree), so this should get interesting. But, I feel almost like this is more of a game. My ultimate goal is to gift purposefully, with items that the person will enjoy and want, that I put lots of thought (not necessarily cashola) into. Heck, sometimes it’s a gift card; sometimes it’s a little homemade sumpin’ sumpin’. PINTEREST, HERE I COME!!! I’m hoping this makes it a more memorable holiday, as well. No new ornaments, so it’ll be a hodgepodge sort of tree, but at least we purchased the tree stand and LED lights already. Hoping to spend minimally on more decorations as well as things like wrapping paper, etc.

It’s also a game to see how little I can spend/how much I can save per month, in general. Looking at it this way makes it feel a little less stressed and simply more vigilant about my purchases. I’m forced to question myself instead of being a thoughtless consumer (hate that term!!! Hate even more that I am one!!!) “Yes, it’s a good price, but do I NEED it?” I’ve also read about sleeping on purchases, which is a very valuable tip. It’s easy to say, “But, I won’t be coming back to this area tomorrow” or “But, the sale ends today!” It WILL be on sale again, and when it is, if it’s still something that will serve a purpose and that I NEED to have in my life or will truly benefit me in some way, then I’ll get it.

Time to dig out my tiny notebook for incidental tallying! The heat is on! What method do you use to ~~budget~~ (hate that term) maintain spending? How do you control your holiday expenses? I’d love to hear YOUR thoughts and methods!

Happy Friday!

I thought that it would be a fun way to celebrate Friday (even on shortened weeks, a Friday is well-earned lately!) to provide a lil’ guide for Black Friday.

Wait, what?!

Yep, I said Black Friday.

Dude, it’s mid-October!!

I’m aware.

But…like…we haven’t even had Halloween yet!!! Isn’t Black Friday, like, 6 weeks away??

Mhmm. BUT, Thanksgiving is wicked late this year (it even overlaps with Hanukkah for the first time, like, ever! No, that’s not true, but it’s the first time in a super long time), meaning that Black Friday, too, is super late and pretty darn close to Christmas.

So, if you’re hoping to scoop up some good deals and get a great crack at your Christmas list on that Day o’ Craziness, I’ve got some tips to help you make the most of the day — meaning spending less money, wasting less time, and maintaining some semblance of your sanity.

It’s kind of funny because we may not even keep our Black Friday tradition this year. My sister and I have been doing it since…well, at least 6 years, I think, but it might go back even further (with every gray hair that shows itself, my memory wanes a bit more). We’ve had every type of experience you can imagine, sans the violence (although there has been some national news-making violence at nearby stores while we were at a nice, safe department store…those wackos). Now, with a couple of cuties (not our husbands, though we lucked out in that department) at home, we want to be sure it’s worth our while to get up at 3, or 4, or 5 to fight the crowds. It looks 50/50 right now, depending on how our lists stack up.

Anyhoo, we still have plenty of knowledge to pass on, so here’s a list to get you ready; the name of the game is PREPARE YOURSELF!:

– Know your ads! We’ve had years (last year was one of them) that we didn’t even peak at the ads until Thanksgiving evening. Not saying that’s stupid…but it’s not the smart thing to do. 😉 Sign up for email updates to see when the ads are leaking (hint: they’re already starting! I got the MACY*S one today…and, if you’re brave enough, the Walmart one is available, too.), and I even downloaded the free app to my phone from blackfriday.com (there are plenty of reliable sites like this one, too). Compare prices in advance!

– Keep a list! Santa does it; you should, too. Yes, you should have a list of everyone you need to buy for and what to get them, but this is a different list. I tend to set it up by store, then item (sometimes in parenthesis I’ll jot down who it’s for…as you can see, I love a good parenthetical notation ;-)) WITH BRAND NAME, COLOR, SIZE, AND HOW MUCH IT COSTS. The last thing you want to do is grab the wrong brand name and end up paying $10 more for a shirt (this doesn’t sound like much, but this is the meaning of BF — the difference between paying $27 for a dress shirt and $17 — and don’t get me started on $9 jeans!!!). You will NOT have time at the check-out to run back and grab what you meant to get. Plus, that line of folks behind you will definitely be shooting you the Grinch-eye. Oh, and keep a polite-but-firm eye on the cash register as things get rung-up. Know thy sale item, know thy price.

– Know your stores! Keep in mind what your favorite stores/products are. If you don’t usually shop at a store, it’s cool to check out their ads in advance, but generally if you don’t like their products (sorry, Sears!), it’s not worth your time and energy to go to that store. Our favorites to peruse in advance are JCP, MACY*S and Kohl’s, with the occasional Old Navy or Target check. This year, I’ll also be staring down the Toys ‘R Us ad, mostly for clothes (since we’re swimming in toys, and we let Santa get the nice, eco-friendly toys that we enjoy playing with, too ;-)). Then, we pick which ones are the most worth our time and visit them in order of relevance. Some years, JCP is our big haul (they have great sales on sheets and towels, and most of Dave’s clothes come from awesome BF sales; I over-buy and put stuff aside for his birthday, which is in February…sneaky wife), while other years Kohl’s is.

– Team up! You may notice I don’t mention Kmart or Walmart. I’ve learned from past experience that Kmart is not usually worth our energy (plus, the one we go to tends to be a bit…ghetto….), and if we need something from Walmart or Best Buy, we send in the big guns: Dave’s brother-in-law and his young adult sons. I swear, they have nerves of steel and are MADE for the strategy of The Great Electronics Battle. Mary and I stay safely in our comfort zone of slippers and ties and pillows. Even Target and Old Navy are rare (unless there’s a huge deal) because folks get cut-throat at these places. Like, crazy.

There is power in numbers, though. If it’s worth the trip, (meaning, you can check a lot of items off your list) walk in the door already knowing what you need, let your partner-in-crime jump in the already-long-line and hunt down BOTH of your items. Be sure to bring along a cell phone to check in (“did you want this color blue or that color blue for John’s sweater?”).

Heck, we even have an annual early-morning phone call with our mom (she’s usually up before 5am, anyway) to let her know how our haul’s going and whether we were able to pick up the items she gave us to grab her. Oh, yeah, we also help out family with anything they may need. It’s the season of helping/loving/sharing, folks!!

And, here are some stress-lifter ideas:

– Remember the reason for the season! I’m not getting all religious-y here, but I’m just reminding you that the reason you’re buying gifts is that you want to share them with the people you love the most. This is NOT about “the hunt” (much as those Target ads try to teach you); it’s about the giving. And if you can save some cash in the process, hooray for you!

That being said, back when Mary and I used to stand in line before the doors opened (I’ll get to that in a minute), we had a habit of drinking cocoa/coffee and singing Christmas carols — especially if there were flurries in the air. Some folks would start singing along; others gave us the evil eye, but we had fun! It was like we were welcoming in the holiday season in our own, crazy way. I highly suggest doing this, or even making your own tradition — go in PJs, or ugly holiday sweaters, or wear Santa hats!

– DON’T knock down the doors! Over the years, we learned that if we waited even 15 minutes, we didn’t have to wait in a line in the cold, pushing our way in (that’s not really our style, anyway); we could leisurely stroll in since the line had already dissipated into the store. The deals WON’T be gone if you wait 15 minutes, or even 30 minutes, or maybe even 1 hour. Oftentimes, we’d go to a pillow display and think they were all gone, only to have a clerk roll out a bin to re-stock. If you can’t find something, ask.

Also, a lot of these deals actually extend over the weekend, so stop by that Saturday or Sunday. The crowds will still be there (heck, that’s how it’ll be up until Christmas Eve; for me, it’s not the crowds, but the crazy drivers that drive me NUTS), but a little less exuberant/rude, and you still might get some good deals.

– Stay home! Yes, I said that. We may do it this year; who knows? Some of these deals are available online. Heck, some deals are available at midnight (or 8pm on Thanksgiving…but I’m not a fan of that) online, so find out if it’ll be worth NOT fighting over a TV and try to grab it online. Oh, and a lot of these deals extend for weeks, so keep checking back over the coming weeks to see if their stock is replenished.

– Know the store’s hours and procedures! Save yourself a headache. Some stores are opening up earlier and earlier, so the “doorbuster” deals may not be worth it if you show up at 5am only to realize folks scooped them up between 8pm and 12am. Also, some stores hand out vouchers to the first 50 people (or some number like that), so even if you show up at 5, the people who have been in line since their last bite of turkey the day before claim dibs on the item. This is most common at electronics stores like Best Buy (and sometimes at Walmart).

So, there you have it! Some ideas for those of us who are brave enough to venture out on Black Friday.

What about you? Have you ever done Black Friday? Any tips to add? Or do you have a post-Thanksgiving tradition (whether shopping or movie-going or cooking or decorating)? Do tell!

Side note: We do try to buy a good percentage (between 25 and 50%) of our gifts from local producers/sellers.

Image is a royalty-free image from Getty Images.

Controlling Baby Clutter Craziness

We’re trying our darnedest not to raise a spoiled brat. I mean, c’mon, I don’t need another me running around, right? 😉 (Side note: I was a brat; not spoiled…regardless of what my siblings might say. Oh, and it has been amended. Mostly.)

That being said, we were humbled and grateful by all that we received for the Hadman’s first birthday. I let the pile of happiness sit in a corner of the living room until it drove us crazy (okay, Dave was driven crazy on day one) enough to finally dig in.

We let Hadley pick a few of the toys out to play with at first but have come to realize that he’d get overstimulated by the mass of new toys plus his accumulation of previous toys. So, I decided to go through them ALL in order to create our own little “store” to pull from and switch the loved-it-but-it’s-boring-now toys out with…only to pull them out again in 6 months.

After pulling my Beatles Rock Band equipment (yes, the drum set, guitar, bass and mic) out of our huge storage ottoman to store in the basement (I will not be getting rid of it!! It’s just not something we have the time or energy to play with now – besides, I’d feel guilty skipping chores while the baby naps to rock out to “Lady Madonna”), I was left with this…

Toddler Clothes Burst - image blogger-image-646728991 on https://megactsout.com

Emptiness!!! Massive emptiness!!! And after a recent Target trip, we came home with this baby. (Not Wee Wee, though he is, by all accounts, a baby. I know he was thinking, “Oh, you’re taking a picture, huh? Don’t you need a model? Let me get in there, you need a model. Don’t look me in the eye.” That’s hysterical if you know his “voice.”)

Toddler Clothes Burst - image blogger-image--1874546741 on https://megactsout.com

We have one in the baby’s room that holds his rarely used toys and stuffed animals, which I also dragged downstairs to empty. After finding 95% of his toys, I dumped them all out and got a look at the situation (as did Winston and Beardslee; find them!)…gulp…

Toddler Clothes Burst - image blogger-image-935029036 on https://megactsout.com

And the little monkey perused the damage, as well… Look at that smirk. We’re in trouble with this one, I tell ya.

Toddler Clothes Burst - image blogger-image--699822630 on https://megactsout.com

At least he’s a willing helper…

Toddler Clothes Burst - image blogger-image-1257755271 on https://megactsout.com

And a surprisingly short time later, we were left with this…

Toddler Clothes Burst - image blogger-image--1349923964 on https://megactsout.com

And this… (We love that push toy but it doesn’t fit anywhere; once he’s walking more and not using it, into storage it goes…or back to Aunt Mary’s house, its rightful owner. ;-))

Toddler Clothes Burst - image blogger-image-1936970629 on https://megactsout.com

There’s the other basket upstairs, and I switched out the previous faux leather storage container to be used for his mass of board books (love them! Nearly indestructible!!) and the smaller one that had been holding those books to be used for the smaller toys in the ottoman. Confusing, but all it means is organization! Yay!!

Along with moving an extra ottoman, the living room feels so large…and makes me think I need a way bigger rug, ha! But, seriously, after all this organizing, Dave and I have realized that we need to put a limit on the toy situation for Christmas. Like, one per set of family, IF they want to get a toy. (Same can be said for outfits but those are at least more of a “need” than a “want.”) We’re even asking Santa for a certain small number of toys, like one educational, one retro, etc. Besides, our real weakness is books…which means we’ll need to find a new book storage strategy, too. I swear it’s never ending.

We’re just so damn lucky.

Overcoming Facebook Addiction 2.0

Two and a half years ago, I posted about trying to overcome my addiction to Facebook. The fact that it’s my #1 blog post makes me realize that I’d better revisit the topic. Actually, I think this calls for an update, a confession/reflection, followed by penance and some small changes that we (yes, you, too!) can make to take control of our lives back. Come along, won’t you?

Okay, first, the hard part: confession! (Recovering Catholic, can’t ya tell?) If you’re “friends” with me on Facebook, you see that I’m sporadically on there; sometimes I’ve got crickets chirping, other times I’ve got one thought-provoking (hopefully) meme after another (weird how the good ones pop up all at once – Must. Hit. Share.).

I must be an addict. What else would explain the amnesia that strikes when I find myself staring blankly at my phone (iPhone be damned!) thinking, “Mmmkay, well how’d that app open?” Seriously, zero recollection of opening it. It’s the only app I get the amnesia over. Think it’s a coincidence? (Side note: Is there a MySpace app? Or is that site just for musicians and stuff now?)

So, there we have it. The first step towards recovery is admitting you have a problem. And I do.

I know Facebook isn’t a drug, and it isn’t all bad. Hell, most of my hits here (over 1,000 a month, thanks, guys!) are from FB. I don’t see myself able to ever give it up 100% because, honestly, I want this blog to spread its wings and soar with the eagles. Or at least some Canada geese. Love those birds.

But, at the same time, I’m sick of feeling owned. Like, I enjoy Pinterest and Instagram but I feel in control of the situation. A day (or a week) can go by easily without my having to check either. I also don’t allow myself to feel like crap (like so many others in articles and posts I’ve read) by the beauteous projects and lives that people display. When and if that happens, I’ll revert to trolling home magazine sites for inspiration that I need and taking plain ol’ pictures to edit with Picassa. S’all good.

With Facebook, it’s not all good. There’s a smidgen of good surrounded by any variation of:

– Drama – Personal, political (often one and the same), veiled posts trying to start something, and rude comments from people (both friend and stranger), and let’s just say I’ve fallen victim of the “public fight with a strong-willed stranger” a few times.

– Fishing – I’ve got low self esteem and even I don’t do this. Soooo what does that say about you when you’re using FB to fish for compliments and validation? It’s even more interesting when no one bites… Awk-ward. Find life-fulfilling, honest ways to do this, folks.

– Over-sharing – Hardly ever intriguing, usually disturbing, alarming, or obnoxiously immature.

– Mean ol’ guilt-trippers – Being an animal lover, I’m connected to several animal rescue pages. Some do an awesome job of informing the public in a respectful manner, but more and more are made up of some mean muthas (and I don’t mean Mom) who use the site to badger people for not calling a government official in Maine (I live in NYS) about a horrific animal abuse case. The guilt is horrible and the tone with which they lecture followers is like a reprimanding. I wish I could save every animal from pain and suffering, but I kind of have a life…and a baby…and three cats I’m too busy spoiling (since they’ve had rough lives before finding their “forever home”, too). It’s like an online version of those ASPCA ads without the music but with insults.

– Super political/self-righteousness – This can be individuals or groups. Let’s just say I’m a left leaning individual just because, well, I am. However, because of my environment and the respect that I have for those around me who may be moderates or right-leaning, I try to post the non-offensive stuff. I follow a couple of groups that post maybe 20% valuable, rational ideas while the rest are Republican bashing. I know there are groups on the other side if the aisle, as

well. Guys…guys. This is what’s wrong with America today. Instead of considering ideas, opinions, conversations, valid information, etc we go with our guts and fight simply because “He’s a liberal.” When did the U.S. become two high school football teams that people sign up for and root for ’til their dying day? I’m okay with posting political ideas, but not offensive slights. (And, yes, I post gay rights things because I feel strongly in favor and the posts are non-offensive; there is a difference between a post you disagree with and a post that personally attacks you.)

I’m sure I’m missing someone, but you catch my drift. But, on to penance. Like I said, I don’t think I’ll ever be a completely healed Facebook-holic, but I hope to lessen my dependence to, well, zero. To be able to consciously use it once in awhile to post a blog post, to avoid the volatility, to respond to a message, and to occasionally unplug without withdrawal. Is that too much to ask?

If you’re interested in getting on the wagon, here are a few methods I’m going to be testing out:

– Time yourself. You know how there are those methods of quitting smoking that allow you a little bit of it in the beginning? Use that as a guide. Consider what you can realistically do – one check a day for 5-10 minutes? (And you may want to set a timer ‘cuz you know FB is a time loss vortex. Seriously, though, you don’t need to see every single post from the last day; this is when you start getting that “my brain has over eaten” feeling.) As you feel comfortable with once daily, see if you can extend it. If not, once daily is actually a huge achievement and will give you SO much of your life back.

– Tally ho! Keep a pen and paper (or make a note on your smartphone…maybe. The concrete reminder may work better.) handy to jot down a tally every time you visit FB, even accidentally. Go a step further and write down the time each time, too. We’ve gotta work on breaking the habit. It’s like having a dieter write down what they eat. You may or may not be surprised by how often you’re perusing Oh Evil Mistress Facebook.

– Purge your list. This will help with the brain-bloat, too. What friends only post things you’re interested in hearing? (ie the ones who don’t suck the air out of the room with every damn post) Which friends or groups give you anxiety or a headache regularly? Lose them, or if you really can’t delete them, edit what posts you receive from them. Seriously, I’ve done this and it has not only saved me some virtual stress but has saved my “real life” relationship with a couple of folks. Not that they need to know that I don’t get their immature, politically-charges rants anymore. Shh!

– Be honest with yourself. What do you use Facebook for; alternatively, what does it do for you? Do you use it to stay in touch with friends and family? Sure, right, we all do that…but it’s only 10% of the truth. Figure out your reasons, then analyze whether you need FB to accomplish these things (sometimes you do; case in point, I need to reach readers). This may help you loosen the strings a bit more realizing that FB isn’t the only way to achieve those things you want to do (or those things you realize you don’t need in your life).

– Put the phone down! Guys. Since I got the iPhone, I’ve been guilty of this, but it’s part of the process. You do not need to be connected 24/7. You’re not the president, or a member of the fire department (if you are, thank you!), or anyone ultimately important. (Okay. You’re important to me, but I don’t need to hear about your insomnia when I wake up in the morning. Love ya, but no one really cares. If your dog goes missing, however, we’ve got your back. Same with any other truly life altering situation.) But at dinner, when you should be playing with the baby (oh, the guilt) or paying attention to your spouse (y’know how spouses of yore would sit and just stare in stony silence when they reached 70? Yeah. Today, we’re doing it at 30. Stop that. You married a person, not your phone.) Allocate time to check your phone, but always put people first. Please and thank you.

– Use the computer. If you must check, only allow yourself to use a computer (and not your work one). The less convenient it is, the less you’ll do it.

– Final step: Walden it up. Thoreau is my hero, but man did that guy get crap DONE in a day! So when you’re getting the urge to waste an hour online, distract yourself in other ways. Do some house cleaning (okay, don’t), exercise, paint or draw or make sock puppets (whatever you like to do creatively, no judgement), watch a documentary (or something with Molly Ringwald; again, no judging; I’d watch a Jimmy Stewart flick), or read a book. I highly suggest going outside (as would Thoreau), even just to water plants or walk for a few minutes. Unplugging is so good for your brain. Y’know, as if nature intended it…

So, there it is. My Facebook Addiction Post 2.0. Let me know if you’ll be taking the journey with me! And, yes, I’m going to post this on FB, but be sure you follow my blog page since I’ll be on my personal one far less. 😉

Purging, Just a Little Bit

I don’t remember exactly which 90s song that is, but I was totally singing it while typing that title, no lie. (I think “Wiggle It”? Does that make sense?) We use that song, er…variations of it, with the munchkin quite a lot.

So, y’know that phase where you’ve got so many projects or cleaning duties to undertake that you’re just clueless where to start? (raises hand) That’d be me. But, lucky me, I saw this post and thought,”Oh, right! I wanted to purge my utensils.” The thought had occurred to me months ago. Whoops. So, here we go. This is what we were dealing with (in slightly dark/fuzzy iPhone pics; hit or miss):

Toddler Clothes Burst - image blogger-image--1806425534 on https://megactsout.com

Toddler Clothes Burst - image blogger-image--1524308578 on https://megactsout.com

Yeah. Two drawers and one counter-top holder; and this doesn’t count the drawer we use for everyday silverware and knives…and a separate knife holder. Wow, i’ve got a lot of kitchen crap. Anyhoo, I wanted to keep the utensil holder and I’m fine with having two utensil drawers (you can’t tell, but I was aiming for one side to be the “less dangerous-slash-less used” side and the other to be the “sharp and frequently used” side.

The baby “helped” me with this project (he wasn’t near any of the sharp stuff, pinkie-swear). I brought the utensil holder and each drawer into the living room to dump-and-purge (kinda like the sound of that) one at a time and gave him a plastic measuring cup or wooden spoon to keep him occupied. Let’s just say a miniature set of wooden spoons is now his, as is one of the extra sets of measuring stuff. #freetoysFTW

So, here’s our “afters”:

Toddler Clothes Burst - image blogger-image--1381386774 on https://megactsout.com

Toddler Clothes Burst - image blogger-image--1421243837 on https://megactsout.com

Toddler Clothes Burst - image blogger-image--571904662 on https://megactsout.com

Okay, you totally can’t tell, but there’s tons more room in the blue holder. Like, I won’t cut my hand open when I try to jam tongs that clearly don’t fit into the thing…again. So, there ya go.

I got rid of tons of second…and, yes, third items. A second wine bottle sucker thing. Two additional sets of measuring cups (one donated to the baby’s cause ;-)). Spoon after spoon after spoon. Why I kept two turkey basters, I’m not sure, but they’re both in such good condition, I just couldn’t help myself.

Boy, am I hoping we can keep it this way. You know the saying “Everything in its place, a place for everything”? I’ve read (a lot) that this is the trick to keeping one’s house tidy and neat. So, when it comes to these kitchen implements, if I take the ice cream scoop from the second drawer, third item from the left, that’s where it goes back. Sounds simple, right? Why is it so dang hard??

With the flooding (and sheer loss of so many memories and important items that people have been dealing with) lately, it hits home the fact that we have plenty more to purge. Just before we had another bout of rain that ended up flooding folks (again!), we grabbed a few boxes of more valuable stuff (we really don’t have much of value; it’s stuff that we’ve collected over time) and, more importantly, emotionally-attached stuff (yearbooks, wedding stuff, my grandmother’s hand-me-downs) and dragged it up to higher ground. Looking around, we realized, “Wait. Why do we HAVE all this crap?” We don’t have a lot down there, but it makes us realize that we’ve just accumulated stuff that we simply don’t need. We also have a pile of stuff for an impending garage sale, but I’m wondering if it’d be worth just donating at this point. Gotta weigh the “will we make $100+?” with “will it give us time for a trip to the beach or the zoo?” options, if ya know what I’m sayin’.

So, I know some of my friends are purging because their stuff has been covered with water, mud, sediment, and, yes, sewage. What have you guys found that you were like, “Where did this even COME from?” Anything weird/interesting to share? I heard of a family who found the dad’s wedding ring, lost for 5 years, in the midst of removing crappy basement mud. There’s always a silver lining! And, yes, we have way more than our basement to purge. 😉 One day at a time.

Had time is our #1 priority lately, though. He’s so dang irreplaceable, and with his first birthday *next week* (gah!!!), we have so much to be thankful for!